i heart food – The Faux Food Diet

I am always trying to make some change in my eating habits, or attempt a new exercise kick, to get in better shape.  Nothing ever seems to work out long term… probably because I am very lazy, and there is not much I won’t do for an apple pie sundae.  I am a below average cook, I couldn’t tell you what separates a t-bone from a London broil.  I actually have no idea how to hard boil an egg.

All said, I heart food.

I’m aware that i am a freak of nature, when I am completely one with a choco-taco,  or chocolate chip cookies, warm bread and butter, super cheesy pizza, lemon coconut cupcakes, vanilla bean milkshakes, Rease’s Pieces, butter pecan ice cream, wheat toast with honey, blueberry oatmeal pancakes, chocolate chip cookies, peanut butter cups, fried fish with tarter sauce, candy corn…(deep inhale)…fresh strawberries, chilled peppermint patties, McDonald’s french fries with tons of salt, chocolate chip cookies, apple crumb pie, maple frosted donuts, oatmeal raisin cookies, cheese burgers, twizzlers, cupcakes, yellow hostess cupcakes, peanut butter and jelly on toast, cucumber sandwiches, vanilla cupcakes… Have i made my point? I don’t have a favorite food… they are all my favorite foods.  Back in the day, I barely worked out, I for the most part ate what I wanted, and I managed to maintain a fairly delicate frame.  These days, I could use a gym membership and a Slimfast.

To make life a little less painful as I embark on my next diet adventure, I’ve decided I can cling to my [probably strange] addiction to fake food.  Fake food, is any food themed art, architecture, clothing, photography, books, album covers, jewelry, and so on.  I have always been drawn to artists renditions of food – whether it’s a giant donut, or a birthday cake sand sculpture, or a miniature dollhouse sandwich.  Maybe i can refocus my urges to eat an entire box of brown sugar pop tarts, and revisit some of my fun findings… Please don’t view on an empty stomach.

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e.j.l. xo